Why a proper throne, even a "lousy" one, is crucial.

This was originally written in response to an r/drums question: "Advice to your former drummer self," which asked: "If you could go back in time and give your younger self some drumming advice, what would you tell him?" To which I said this:

<grabs 21-year-old self by the collar>

Listen, self, I know you're in college and broke as a joke, and I know drum gear is expensive, but there are some things you just have to spend the money on. You know what's going to happen if you spend too long playing while seated on two stacked milk crates instead of a proper throne? You're going to fuck up your hips for life. Flexing your hip joints over those hard edges will give you tightness and cramps and discomfort in all the muscles and connective tissues in your hips for the rest of your days. If you keep doing that, you will live every single day of your life with an actual pain in your actual ass, and you will learn firsthand why that became a figure of speech: because having pain in your ass is a real pain in the ass.

There's being thrifty, then there's being cheap. Being cheap can get really expensive really fast. Buy a goddamn proper throne already, you dumb cheap bastard. The lifelong health of your ass depends on it.

Added in a later comment:

Literally any proper throne, even a cheap uncomfortable one, would have prevented my ass from feeling twenty years older than the rest of my body, if I'd only bought it in time.

Narrator: "He didn't, and now his butt hurts every single day."

So gang, if you do not have an actual proper adjustable drum throne, put it at the very top of your list. Do not spend one thin dime on literally any piece of drum gear until you have one - not so much as a single tension rod or cymbal felt. It is the single most important purchase you need to make if you haven't already bought one. My sore ass is living proof. As I always say, I made the mistakes, and I'm passing the savings on to you!